Cambridge Dec. ‘10

Despite working in overdrive mode a bit I’m fine and didn’t catch the Virus that was going round. True to my INTP type I’ve been up late nights doing a review eco-build systems and getting quite into that though not good for my back or my mood the next day. However I enjoy feeling my passion for this right now, something I’ve followed for many years now is maturing and I feel the satisfaction in contributing something in this complicated world of eco-building. 

Most days I notice the decorating work I did on the Abbey House windows and wonder how many years/decades my ingenious efforts (using new paintable silicone sealant) will stay good and save Windhorse in redecoration or repair work. The Community Secondary Triple Glazing took much longer than the anticipated six to eight months (not having decided on another co-worker at the beginning extended it). I kept thinking someone suitable would turn up which didn’t happen early enough. 

Windhorse was the guinea pig I used for starting the business which is now frustratingly put back to next year. I would not have got to the level of product refinement I had without Keturaja’s input. I’m now very please and think the ‘STG’ is actually what you might call a ‘sexy’ product now and rather beautiful, particularly 9 Auckland Rd’s cute back room twin casements. And they bring the whole window U-value down from around 5-Uw to 1-Uw in most cases.

Now though I feel fairly happy to take a half year off work, after several hard years of slogging it out, and have some head space to focus on Dhamma. I’m excited to be involved in the new Dhammaduta Course and the following Bhante Land Project and spending time with my spiritual friends in Birmingham again. Still I am following the call of a big Dhammic project; to be in the centre of where it’s happening. 

I feel the place is coming for potential new buildingteam-based right livelihoods to thrive; Kalayana Mitrata and a minimum of combined skills are the basis for it. Knowing that I can make good money and enjoy making windows for people by myself (which has its appeal anyway) is a good place to start from, at least;  but managing/training people and setting up something for the movement is something I would need to develop or borrow skills for, based on my experience of taking on an apprentice. 

I realise now why most builders would only take on a tradesman with a few years of experience not even just a carpentry qualification which itself doesn’t mean that much. I, with the little Carpentry skills I have, was trying to train an unskilled man while working it out at the same time. The only thing that made it viable was his high level of enthusiasm and commitment and the longer expected pay off time if he continues in building work. I wanted to set up something available to any young (or old) Buddhist men to join and am just now having to admit how much dexterity and even strength is needed, necessitating long term commitment. 

I’ve also realised how essential it is to maintain a purely emotionally positive approach when managing/training - possibly effecting job output (or having a specific intensive training period rather than mixing training and work) or only taking on skilled tradesmen where micromanaging is less likely to occur; no one likes it - one of the real attractions of being a Carpenter is that you can be your own boss and it requires you to use your own knowledge and skill. I’ve also seen the vicious circle that happens when over management exacerbates mistakes due to a lack of confidence. I don’t like to be told what to do in my work and people are attracted to Building work for this reason, us Buddhists also tend not to like being told what to do, like me these people need a project to get involved in; can we make it work?

My vision primarily is for a partly structured retreat-like setup with a workshop for us to work in a few hours a day perhaps, and a large chunk of the time being dedicated collectively or otherwise to meditation, study or puja, and there being an atmosphere which is conducive to this. I want this for myself and want other men in the movement to have access to a more retreat-like supportive context, similar perhaps to a larger guhyaloka in the UK but with Carpentry and more income. Skills and Dhamma training must be an essential part of it and the basis on which men know they are join it. I would see its main function as being an intensive Going For Refuge context for Mitras and men in Ordination Training, then also as a happy place of Dhammic commitment which Order Members won’t want to leave, ensuring it’s continued Dhammic and skills basis into a Dhammically and financially successful future - something many of our Team-based Right Livelihoods have failed, or are struggling, to do. I want our Movement, not to mention our dwindling Team Based Right Livelihood effort to survive in the form we need it to. Communities arise on the basis of Dhamma team projects, what’s the ‘Movement’ with only one of the three C’s? That’s not my cup of tea.

I have also reflected recently that teaching the Dhamma without offering the Buddha and Sangha can’t be done can it? (I’m thinking of things like MBSR where it’s considered ‘Dhamma’), and that telling someone not to try reproducing ‘insights’ is dubious since can there ever be two experiences of Bodhi? I am sad to hear of people who have decided that Enlightenment doesn’t ‘exist’. It does so keep trying! Infact if one thinks that death is the end to all it makes attaining Enlightenment ‘as the end of all suffering’ obsolete! We need to consider whether we believe this so we can see it’s affect on our motivation to practise.